Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Isaiah, Chapters 12 & 13: Cognitive Dissonance

Chapter 12

Six blessedly short verses all about finding peace and salvation in god. Too bad the entire rest of the book is a series of lunatic rants against Israel's enemies and predictions of a messiah that no one will be alive to confirm.

Chapter 13

First rant: Babylon. Hoo boy is god pissed at Babylon. His revenge: raise an army to destroy the land whilst simultaneously making the Babylonians' knees weak and melting their hearts. What does it say about you when your deity is so uncertain of your ability to win all by yourselves that he has to render your enemies completely helpless? I think it says your priestly caste wants the credit.

Nasty anti-woman insult: the enemies will wail like women in childbirth. And the women, who did not write this book, will roll their eyes.

God will blot out all light whilst making the people's faces go up in flames, shake the heavens, and move earth around a bit. He's going to run all the Babylonians and their families through with swords, dash their children to pieces and rape their women. What a charming fellow he sounds like.

Babylon will become so unpleasant that only satyrs and dragons will want to live there. Already I'm counting the chapters until this book is over: 53. 53 more chapters of this drivel.

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