Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Proverbs, Chapter 11: The list of not-so-zingy zingers commenceth

The rest of this book is just a series of unconnected one-liners. Since most of them are neither snappy nor memorable, I'll leave it up to you to read the in detail if you so choose and instead focus on the ones I think are either thought-provoking or insane.

First off, use accurate weights and measures. Pride begets shame and destruction. Then there are a lot of verses hammering home the point that there are no rewards to being evil and how being righteous is, well, righteous. One does wonder if the book doth protest too much.

Only gossips tell secrets. As if this is news. Also, as if there has ever, in the entire history of the world, been a person who wasn't a gossip. Never, ever lend money to strangers. Being kind is good for the soul. As a jewel of gold in a swine's snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion (v. 22). I have to say, plenty of hot, dumb chicks do fine, as long as they lay off Asians at UCLA.

The desire of the righteous is only good: but the expectation of the wicked is wrath (v. 23) Talk about your self-serving bible verses! The liberal soul shall be made fat (v. 25) If only! Be nice to your family.

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