Josiah attempts to save the Isrealites from god's predicted punishment of enslavement by the Babylonians. He fails.
Josiah gathers up all the elders and priests and important people and reads to them from Deuteronomy. They all promise to do what the book says. He has the temples and shrines to Baal torn down, then has the whole thing burned near a creek and then throws the ashes on the graves of the children of the worshippers. Then he destroys the houses of homosexuals. Wouldn't you love to live in a theocracy?
He rounds up the priests and defrocks them, only allowing them to eat unleavened bread together in a sort of priestly rubber room. Finally, someone destroys the place of child sacrifice. He removes horses and chariots from the temple that had been consecrated to the sun. He has the altars that Manasseh built beaten into sheet metal and destroyed. Then he turns all the Baal sites into graveyards.
The defrocked priests are now killed. He reinstitutes Passover, which had not been celebrated since Judges. Then he removes all the familiar animals, the wizards and their idols. It isn't enough for god, who still plans to send the Israelites to Babylon.
The Egyptians now invade, and Josiah is killed, thus negating the promise god made that he would die a peaceful death. His son Jehoahaz takes over, and goes right back to being bad, which, given that god didn't even keep his one promise to his father, I don't blame him for. The Egyptian pharaoh arrests him and taxes the Israelites heavily. He installs a puppet king and takes Jehoahaz back to Egypt, where he dies. The puppet pays the tribute and reigns for 11 idolatrous years.
Showing posts with label Josiah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Josiah. Show all posts
Saturday, October 2, 2010
Thursday, September 30, 2010
2 Kings, Chapter 22
Josiah makes a last-ditch effort to save the Israelites and fails.
Josiah is 8 when he ascends the throne of Israel. When he's 18, he sends one of his scribes to the temple to see how the treasury is doing so he can have it repaired. When the scribe talks to Hilkiah the priest, he reveals a book he found, which is Deuteronomy, Moses dying rant to the Israelites. As his scribe reads it to him, Josiah gets so upset he rends his clothes. As anyone would, if forced to sit and listen to the entire book of Deuteronomy in one go. He also orders him to find out what exactly the book means for the future of Israel.
The scribe and the priest go to Huldah the prophetess, who lives in a college. Huh. I didn't know they had colleges then. She tells them god is angry and planning to destroy Israel, because they've been worshipping other gods. Well, they've been doing that since the beginning of 1 King's, so I don't know why it's happening now, except for narrative convenience. The only comfort she can offer Josiah is that god will let him die peacefully and he won't see the fall.
Josiah is 8 when he ascends the throne of Israel. When he's 18, he sends one of his scribes to the temple to see how the treasury is doing so he can have it repaired. When the scribe talks to Hilkiah the priest, he reveals a book he found, which is Deuteronomy, Moses dying rant to the Israelites. As his scribe reads it to him, Josiah gets so upset he rends his clothes. As anyone would, if forced to sit and listen to the entire book of Deuteronomy in one go. He also orders him to find out what exactly the book means for the future of Israel.
The scribe and the priest go to Huldah the prophetess, who lives in a college. Huh. I didn't know they had colleges then. She tells them god is angry and planning to destroy Israel, because they've been worshipping other gods. Well, they've been doing that since the beginning of 1 King's, so I don't know why it's happening now, except for narrative convenience. The only comfort she can offer Josiah is that god will let him die peacefully and he won't see the fall.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
1 Kings, Chapter 13
God sure is capricious!
Jeroboam is doing some sacrificing in Bethel when an old man approaches and prophesies that one of his descendants, Josiah will sacrifice priests on that very same altar. So much for that argument that the Israelites are somehow better than the worshippers of Baal because they don't sacrifice each other! He also predicts the destruction of the altar.
Jeroboam orders his men to capture the prophet, but as soon as he touches him, his arm shrivels up à la Bob Dole or John McCain. Then the altar falls apart. Then Jeroboam asks the prophet to ask god to restore his hand. And god does. Remember how thousands of people died after the first golden calf debacle? And now Jeroboam's arm is temporarily shrunken? God sure is inconsistent!
Jeroboam invites the man back for dinner, but he says he can't: god told him not to eat or drink until he gets home.
As he's on his way, another prophet waylays him and asks him in for dinner. He convinces the first prophet by saying an angel told him it would be okay. That convinces prophet one, who makes merry until the holy spirit takes over prophet two and informs him he's broken god's commandment. He informs him that his punishment is he won't be buried with his ancestors. The host sends the prophet away. The prophet is immediately killed by a lion, who then hangs out on the road with the body and the ass he was riding on.
Prophet two goes around like a member of The Hills cast, telling everyone who will listen that the visitor was punished by god. Of course he doesn't mention his own role in all of this.
He does feel some guilt, however, because eventually he goes and collects the body and puts it in his own mausoleum and tells his sons to put him next to the other prophet on his death.
Jeroboam, meanwhile, hasn't taken anything away from the incident. He continues to make anyone and everyone a priest, kind of like those web sites now where you can be ordained so you can perform your friends' wedding ceremonies. It is predicted that eventually this will destroy the house of Jeroboam.
Jeroboam is doing some sacrificing in Bethel when an old man approaches and prophesies that one of his descendants, Josiah will sacrifice priests on that very same altar. So much for that argument that the Israelites are somehow better than the worshippers of Baal because they don't sacrifice each other! He also predicts the destruction of the altar.
Jeroboam orders his men to capture the prophet, but as soon as he touches him, his arm shrivels up à la Bob Dole or John McCain. Then the altar falls apart. Then Jeroboam asks the prophet to ask god to restore his hand. And god does. Remember how thousands of people died after the first golden calf debacle? And now Jeroboam's arm is temporarily shrunken? God sure is inconsistent!
Jeroboam invites the man back for dinner, but he says he can't: god told him not to eat or drink until he gets home.
As he's on his way, another prophet waylays him and asks him in for dinner. He convinces the first prophet by saying an angel told him it would be okay. That convinces prophet one, who makes merry until the holy spirit takes over prophet two and informs him he's broken god's commandment. He informs him that his punishment is he won't be buried with his ancestors. The host sends the prophet away. The prophet is immediately killed by a lion, who then hangs out on the road with the body and the ass he was riding on.
Prophet two goes around like a member of The Hills cast, telling everyone who will listen that the visitor was punished by god. Of course he doesn't mention his own role in all of this.
He does feel some guilt, however, because eventually he goes and collects the body and puts it in his own mausoleum and tells his sons to put him next to the other prophet on his death.
Jeroboam, meanwhile, hasn't taken anything away from the incident. He continues to make anyone and everyone a priest, kind of like those web sites now where you can be ordained so you can perform your friends' wedding ceremonies. It is predicted that eventually this will destroy the house of Jeroboam.
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